


Grace

by wintercreek



Series: 6/7 Interstices [4]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M, Juvenilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-09-04
Updated: 2002-09-03
Packaged: 2017-10-06 05:02:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintercreek/pseuds/wintercreek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She wasn't his type. They all agreed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Grace

**_grace n._ 1\. Seemingly effortless beauty or charm of movement, form, or proportion.**

She wasn't his type. They all agreed. Buffy and Dawn offered their expert opinions and announced that she wasn't for Xander. Even Xander decided there, on that particular spot in the Bronze, that this woman was nothing but a dead end for him.

He couldn't keep his eyes off of her.

This strange, exotic woman in the UCSunnydale shirt moved like no one Xander had ever seen. She led slightly with her hips as she walked, as though the rest of her had fallen a bit behind. "She's French. I'm sure of it," Buffy had pronounced.

"What?!" Dawn was incredulous, at best.

"I knew a French guy who walked like that," Buffy explained matter-of-factly.

"That doesn't mean that _all_ French people walk like that!" an outraged Dawn replied.

Buffy shrugged. "I just think she's French, ok?"

Xander looked up. "What?"

~*~

**2\. A characteristic or quality pleasing for its charm or refinement.**

The mystery woman had a small mole near her left eye. She had long, nearly black hair with highlights the color of hot chocolate on a snowy day. Dark eyes sparkled in a tan face. Seated alone at a table with a cup of coffee, she projected the air of a lady. Slender legs crossed delicately at the ankles, posture perfect. Clearly not Xander's type.

_It's not like she'd talk to me anyway. It's not like any woman should be willing to talk to me. Not after what I did to Anya. ''m just doomed to live a lonely life. What I deserve. It's better to keep to myself, not to risk being like my father._

She even held her coffee cup with her pinky curved gently out.

"Excuse me, ladies." Xander stood up, leaving Buffy and Dawn to look bemusedly after him.

"What's he doing? Didn't we all agree that she's not his type?"

"Maybe he's changed his vote."

The man in question himself was oblivious to the Summers women's discussion. His primary concern was successfully crossing the dance floor. And then figuring out what to say. Unfortunately for Xander, the only suave opening line that came to mind was "Hey, I'm Xander. What's your name?"

It seemed to work well enough. "I'm Danielle. Nice to meet you. Would you like to sit down?" Her rich voice held a light French accent. Her nose twitched just a little as she smiled up at Xander.

"Uh, uh, yes. Thank you." _Ugh. Way to go, Romeo._

"Where are you from? Are you a student here?" Danielle immediately jump-started the conversation.

"Well, I grew up here in Sunnydale. I'm not a student, actually; I'm working with a construction crew. I like to build things."

"Ah, a working man."

"Yes. And you?"

"I'm from Portland, but before that I'm from France. My family moved to the United States when I was sixteen. I've just finished my freshman year here at UCSunnydale."

"Oh. What do you think you want to do?"

"I think I want to teach French. Or possibly teach English to French people. I love languages and I love helping people say what they need to say, so that's what I hope to do, anyway."

~*~

**3\. A sense of fitness or propriety.**

"Xander?"

"Yes?"

"It's 6 am. We should go home."

"Oh."

They'd talked all night. The Bronze had finally closed around 2 am, so Xander and Danielle had continued to an all-night diner. Together, they stood and walked out to the parking lot side by side. Once they reached Danielle's car, she turned to face Xander. "Thank you. I had a lovely time."

"I'm glad. Can I see you again? I mean, may I see you again?"

"Of course. I would be delighted." Danielle gave Xander her phone number, climbed in her car, and drove off.

Xander, for his part, walked over to his new-ish car, and got in. He didn't start the engine yet, sitting to allow himself to savor the new and unusual feeling settling somewhere in his being. A sense of peace, and of finding something so long lost that he hadn't known it was missing.


	2. Grace Will Lead Me Home

_Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound / That saved a wretch like me_

Alexander Lavelle Harris was petrified. There was no other way to describe it. But he'd promised. _No escaping this one._ He straightened his tie, brushed off his slacks, and headed out to the car. _Nothing to it but to do it._

~*~

_I once was lost, but now am found / Was blind, but now I see_

Danielle Catherine Grace L'Heureux was pleased. She was almost insufferably pleased. Xander had promised. _It's about time._ She gave her skirt a tug, checked her shoes, and stepped over to the door to wait. _This will be good for him._

~*~

_T'was grace that taught my heart to fear / And grace my fears relieved_

The church was Unitarian. Danielle had compromised on that aspect, on the grounds that Unitarians would some how be less intimidating. "I don't even go to church very much anymore. But this is important to me, Xander, and I want to see if you understand it."

Xander, having correctly received the impression that he was being tested, had agreed.

And now here they were. The church was empty--they'd arrived perhaps half an hour after the last Sunday service. "Don't we need a minister, or pastor, or whatever they're called?"

"Not for this. Just trust me, Xander. You'll like this."

_This is not at all what I expected. I thought Danielle was taking me to a service._

The two walked arm-in-arm through the doors of the church. Xander's inner carpenter gazed around respectfully, examining the wooden pews. At the front pew, Danielle motioned for him to sit. She continued the few feet to the front of the church, just below the dais. Xander watched, perplexed, as she turned to face him and drew in a deep breath.

_"Amazing grace, how sweet the sound / That saved a wretch like me. / I once was lost, but now am found, / Was blind but now I see."_ Danielle's warm alto voice filled the church.

_"T'was grace that taught my heart to fear / And grace my fears relieved. / How precious did the grace appear, / The hour I first believed._

_"Through many dangers, toils and snares, / I have already come. / T'is grace has brought me safe thus far, / And grace will lead me home._

_"When we've been there ten thousand years, / Bright shining as the sun, / We've no less days to sing God's praise, / Than when we'd first begun."_

At some point during the song, Xander's mouth had fallen open. Danielle grinned at him. "That's about the reaction I was going for."

"You're amazing. I ... you're amazing. You're my amazing grace."

Danielle wrapped both arms around Xander. "Through many dangers, toils and snares, you have already come. T'is grace has brought you safe thus far, and grace shall lead you home," she whispered. Then she let go of him, stepping back for a moment. Xander simply stood there, bathed in the color spangled light of the stained glass windows.

Danielle stretched out her hand, and Xander lifted his hand to meet hers.

They walked out of the church, hand in hand, no sound save for the echoing of their footsteps.


	3. the beating of your heart

"Danielle, we need to talk." The words echoed through her mind as she sat, lonely and scared, waiting silently in the park. Xander had asked to meet her there, and he hadn't sounded happy about it. "Danielle, we need to talk."

_What does he mean? What couldn't he say to me over the phone?_

There was nothing for it but to wait. So Danielle waited, her legs crossed neatly and lady-like at the ankle, her heart full of dread. _He's going to leave me._

~*~

Watching him stride into the park made her breath catch in her throat. _You can't leave me. I need you._ Danielle seldom admitted need, but she was close to it now. _Everyone says how good I am for you. If only they knew how good you are for me._

~*~

Xander's steps faltered as he approached Danielle's bench. "Hello," he managed to utter.

"Hello. Xander, why ... ?"

"I need to say something, to know something. I don't think this is going to work. It's ... I don't share your faith. When I look at a church, all I see is beautiful woodwork. Pretty windows. There's nothing else there.

"When I look at you, there's something there. Something I haven't felt before. I can't describe it fully. If you know what I mean, then maybe there's enough to make this work. But if what I can't see means more than what I feel, then we can't do this."

"Xander, I don't understand." Danielle was sincerely baffled. "What gave you the idea that I needed you to believe the same things I do? Do you know that Alice Walker poem?

_love is not concerned  
with whom you pray  
or where you slept  
the night you ran away_

_love is concerned  
that the beating of your heart  
should kill no one._

If you looked at a church and saw only firewood, I would still ... love you."

"You love me?"

"I do. I love you." It felt good to say it.

It felt fantastic to hear. "I love you too. Does this mean ... I just ... how do you feel when you look at me? Do you feel it, too?"

"When I look at you. Hmm. It's difficult to articulate, but I'll try. Sometimes when we're together, I can't see you but I still know you're there. It's a deep certainty that I don't need to confirm; it's a kind of visceral knowledge that no matter what happens, you'll be beside me, doing whatever needs to be done. It's the security I've been looking for.

"People like to tell me how strong I am. How I'm their rock. I can lean on you, Xander. You're the first person I've found in a long time with whom I can be me. Not strong. Not weak. Me."

"Wow."

"I take it that was the answer you were looking for?" Danielle was flushed, but her voice was still calm.

"I ... yeah."

"Phew. Thank God that's done."

"You were nervous?"

"Of course I was, silly. I thought I'd lose you."

"Oh." And with those few moments, Xander finally saw not only how much good it did for him to love Danielle, but also how good it was for her to be loved by him. Now all that remained was to get his grandmother's ring.


	4. By Your Side

"Xander, where are we going?"

"Just trust me. Hey, no fair moving the blindfold!"

Sighing, Danielle lowered her hands. She allowed Xander to guide her up a set of stairs towards her mysterious surprise.

"Ok, here we go ..." Xander removed the blindfold.

Danielle stifled a gasp. She found herself in Xander's guest room, a room she knew well since Danielle refused to share a bed with anyone but her husband. The normally white walls were now covered in words, each quote painted in a different color. She pivoted slowly.

Xander slowly walked to the door, closing it. On its white back, in a rose pink paint, was the poem Danielle had quoted to Xander that day in the park. "... Love is concerned / that the beating of your heart / should kill no one," he read.

Danielle smiled. Near the ceiling, on the window side of the room and written in dark blue, she spotted one of her many favorite quotes. "I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of stars makes me dream. Vincent van Gogh."

"Give light, and the darkness will disappear by itself. Erasmus." Xander called her attention to the goldenrod words.

It became a game of sorts, each reading the quote that caught her or his eye.

"Life is too important to be taken seriously. Oscar Wilde."

"It's all just fun and games until someone loses an eye ... then it's just fun and games you can't see! James Hetfield of Metallica."

"I am forever walking upon the shore, / Betwixt the sand and the foam. / The high tide will erase my footprints, / And the wind will blow away the foam. / But the sea and the shore will remain forever. Kahlil Gibran."

"Some people care too much. I think it is called love. Pooh, A. A. Milne."

"Pain nourishes courage. You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you. Mary Tyler Moore."

"Let the river be your guide, let the sun be your warmth, let the trees be your shelter, let the wind be your force ... and remember I am always by your side and in your heart. Ruth Elaine Schram."

"Better to light a candle than curse the darkness. Chinese proverb."

"We do not remember days ... we remember moments. Cesare Pavese."

"Nothing is worth more than this day. Goethe."

"Everything that is done in the world is done by hope. Martin Luther."

"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly. Anonymous."

"Courage and grace are a formidable mixture. Marlene Dietrich." Xander flashed a huge grin at Danielle as he read that quote.

She followed his gaze to that particular wall, one which had previously been at her back. Written there were the words of "Amazing Grace," their special song. Several other quotes also paid homage to one of her middle names: "Words can sometimes, in moments of grace, attain the quality of deeds. Elie Wiesel." "If we cannot be decent, let us endeavor to be graceful. If we can't be moral, at least we can avoid being vulgar. Langdon Mitchell." Only one quote on the wall didn't hold the word "grace." "Will ..." Danielle's voice failed her.

Xander stepped forward, turned her to face him and knelt. His voice shook only a little as he spoke the words Danielle had been unable to read. "Will you marry me? Danielle Catherine Grace L'Heureux, will you be my wife?"

"I ... I ... YES!" Danielle's composure was broken as she squealed and jumped into her fiancé's arms. She feared that Xander's grin would split his cheeks, as he slipped his grandmother's engagement ring on to Danielle's finger.

"And that," Xander replied, "is now my favorite quote."

Danielle pointed to the far wall. "'I am always by your side and in your heart,'" she read softly.


End file.
